There I am, sitting in the doctor's office (again) and attempting to understand why we need an additional test to prepare for IVF. It's "extra" the translator says. The nurse and the office manager contribute their two cents, in Turkish of course. All that and I still don't understand. Is there something wrong with me? What's the problem? They continue to banter back and forth, but I'm still lost, and then I hit it. The wall. I put my head in my lap and closed my eyes. It's too much. The visits, the pressure, the cost, the stress, the fear, the language barrier, all of it.
Last night I hit it again. I pouted, I kicked, I screamed. I do NOT want any more shots. I'm tired of poking myself in the arm and stomach every day with these STUPID hormones. It hurts. It sucks. My ovaries are giant. BLAH.
(Yes, I know it will be worth it. Yes, I know there are worse things in the world. Yes, I know it is elective. Shut it.)