To all parents and future parents, here are some tips for a successful and pleasant parent/teacher relationship.
1. Communicate! Just like in any relationship, communication is key. This does not mean you should send a message through your child. Call, email, or write a note. Five year olds don't have the best memory. If something is going on, do not wait until the day before report cards to bring it up with the teacher.
2. Participate! When things are sent home for practice, work with your child to practice. If your child was able to sit and work on these skills alone, teachers would not be necessary. And yes, even if your child says they already did it, you should practice with them. Just as dentists can not hold all the responsibility for clean teeth, teachers can not hold all the responsibility for education. Same goes for behavior. If behavior is an issue, participate at home. If you make it clear that bad behavior is not tolerated, their school behavior will improve.
3. Ask! If an issue comes up, something is not understood, or you are in need of something- ASK. Do not tell. Do not force. Do not accuse. Do not attack. Ask for the teachers input. We are people. We do not work for you, so please do not treat us as employees.
4. Mind your tongue! If there is an issue in the class with the teacher, with a specials teacher, or with the school itself, do not discuss it with or in front of your child. Your negative attitude or lack of respect will rub off on your child. Guaranteed. Children should not discuss adult issues, so don't discuss it with them. The worst thing a teacher can hear is, "Well my MOM said that you..." I don't divulge your parenting issues to your child, and I expect the same respect.
5. Read! If something is sent home, read it. All of it. Do not blame your child's teacher for your lack of understanding due to not reading. (If you still don't understand after reading, see 3.)
6. Volunteer! Make yourself available as much as possible. For projects, parties, or even just for conferences. Let your child's teacher know that education is important to you. However, do not be a leech. Your child is now in school. What a perfect time to get a hobby. A hobby that does not include being up the teacher's butt.
7. Understand! Please know that while your child is special, precious, and totally lovely, they may also act differently at school. Your child will be held responsible for his/her decisions. Your child will not be treated with kid gloves because you have no hobby. (See 6.)
8. Respect! Respect that we have gone to school for this position. While we may not be perfect, most of us do everything in our power to help your child. While I am sure that you believe your child is gifted/not ADD/perfect/etc., please respect the teacher's opinion as a trained PROFESSIONAL.
9. Share! Just as you do not want to receive notes only when your child is bad, teachers do not want to only receive notes for problems. Are you noticing your child has become a super reader? Are they really enjoying school? Did they mention something funny? Share that with the teacher as well. Goodness knows we don't get paid enough, so kind notes go along way to make up the difference.
10. Prepare! Set your child up for success. Get them to school on time, dress them appropriately, work with them before Kindergarten, feed them meals that increase focus, discuss correct choices. YOU are an equal part in the ultimate success or failure of your child in school. Help them to put their best foot forward by making sure they are prepared.
Are you a parent? Print this out! Review it! Your child's teacher will be thankful.
Not a parent? Study now. Don't be a whacko. Trust me, they will talk about you in the lounge.
14 comments:
Thanks for the tips Casey. I dont' want to be a WHACKO! :-) And I have at least 5 more years before any of this is relavent, but I will study it for sure!
so true. They should hand out something like this on orientation night. Dash-1 is in preschool and I'm learning the ropes of no longer being IN the class but being a parent. Whole new ballgame.
Could you do a nice list like this for teachers, I'd like to print it out and slip it under his schools door. They are great but they do have their issues....
Wonderful list! It really does amaze me the things parents think teachers should be able to do for their children. You guys aren't the parents, nor should you have to be!
I hope your kids are all starting to show signs of improvement, and you aren't totally pulling your hair out yet.
a great list! i am just now getting into parent/teacher relationships, but am eager to learn about how to make school great for all parties involved!! :)
I don't have kids yet, but I love this!
I can't agree more!
As one of your teacher friends, I have two words: AMEN SISTER!!! I have two parents that I may anonymously mail this to tomorrow : )
As always, I hope things are going well!! Good to hear you'll be home at Christmas--you deserve a holiday with your family!
I so agree with you! I teach 4k in a small lutheran school. The problem I encounter is the fact that each parent thinks they birthed the next best thing to sliced bread. Yes, every child is special but each child has been blessed with a different set of gifts and talents. It is my job to help some children develop their gifts and that sometimes takes extra work. I wish parents would be somewhat open when you tell them that their child needs some extra help. It is not to punish them as one parent put it but to help their child grow be the best they can be.
Great list, Casey! I have a few teachers in my family, who I'm sure would wholeheartedly support your list too.
1. I missed you too!
2. Some People Should NOT procreate
From a teachers perspective...Thank you!! We are all thinking it and appreciate your eloquence and humor!
Oh, my goodness yes!! Especially the parts about get a hobby but also be involved. It's a fine line. But also, know what's best for your kid. I am currently struggling with a parent who is CONVINCED he son should be in honors because it's the best place for him but the fact is that he is falling way behind, is confused the majority of the time, and rarely finishes his work. I got an email from her the other day saying "I don't think my son is capable of doing the test that is coming up because he really struggles with abstract thinking!" Like I'm going to say "oh, well yes. I'd hate to jeopardize his place in honors so why don't I just go ahead and allow him to not take the test. Honestly, I think he'd be way happier in regular level. He'd certainly be more successful.
Great post! Great tips! It's amazing how many parents just don't give a crap and expect the school to raise their kids. The poor kids lose every time. The school just isn't equipped to handle the job of parent AND teacher.
Amen Amen Amen...I worked as a Speech Path in schools and these are so perfect.
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